On my seriously lackadaisical feature “Tuesday Links” I try to share with you some interesting things I encounter on the web along with my thoughts, such as they are.
I have already talked about that controversial substance, homemade playdough (to add further fuel, I'll just say that I see no point in buying the stuff), so this is not about that delicate topic per se, but more about the broader idea of setting up your mind and your home to allow your growing children to do things by themselves!
But in a way that doesn't make you insane.
Sew Liberated |
Today let's visit Meg at Sew Liberated.
Making a Montessori-style activity space happens to be something she's passionate about (can you believe that rug that she made while pregnant?), and that's good for us, because it gives us ideas of how to incorporate the child's work into our plans for our family.
Don't worry — not everyone can have a room like Meg's, nor do I think it's necessarily important to aim for exactly that — most children want to be with you and the other children.
They can have their corner in the rooms where you yourself work all day (kitchen and den are where you'll find me, usually, or outside, I guess, although I can't imagine that right now).
I wish I had a picture of Bridget's kitchen corner when she was younger. Just a corner of the den with objects her size for keeping house. It's because of that corner that she learned to be so neat and tidy that she thanks me now when I vacuum, although usually she just does it to her own specifications!
Children are overwhelmed by clutter and disorganization. Why is it that we give them a million little pieces to dump out and then get frustrated that they can't pick them up? Because we are focused on the idea of them playing with their toys, rather than on making the whole process of taking something out, using it, and then putting it back do-able.
(Come to think of it, maybe we have this problem ourselves!)
Besides convincing yourself that even a baby can do it himself — just watch the video!
— the big key learning here is the importance of having few things (especially toys! There are very few worthwhile toys!)…
…and the undeniable importance of…
SHELVES.
Isn't this beautiful? But actually really simple. |
In the category of “Things I wish I had realized long ago” the biggest one is “Shelves are my friend.”
Few things.
Useful things.
Beautiful things.
A place to put them.
The patience to let them “do it by myself” — patience that is grounded in the knowledge that nothing terrible will happen if it's not done just right, since overall order reigns.
While you are over there enjoying little Finn and his serious play (and I love this older post too) would you say a prayer for Meg's family as they await the arrival of their little one, Lachlan, and peace as they deal with his serious heart condition?
priest's wife says
looking at the sweet video- it occurred to me that Montessori- style education is perfect for special-needs kids. Wouldn't an autistic child love the order and also the sanity of steps to accomplish a goal?
And I am just drooling over that space…
Pippajo says
“Things I wish I had realized long ago”, indeed. I only saw my children's obsessions with continually removing everything from every shelf at their level over and over again as an annoyance instead of an opportunity to build on it and show them how to then PUT BACK over and over again. I could have increased their fun two-fold as well as saved myself a lot of repeating myself nowadays if only I'd been more astute!
Incidentally, and I don't mean to contradict you, just mention as a point of interest, Redheaded Snippet had a toy vacuum (that actually sucked things up) when she was a toddler. She LOVED that thing and played with it constantly. I had great hopes for her housekeeping future but, alas, she absolutely HATES to vacuum now. Where did I go wrong?
P.S. We've been Zone Cleaning one hour every afternoon (based on your model) for about three weeks now and it's working very well! The children are even starting to forget to complain!
Karen says
Add me to the wish-I-had-realized-this-years-ago camp! I now have one kid in middle school and one in elementary, and after nearly losing my mind about the backpacks dumped in the middle of the dining room, it finally dawned on me that I needed to create a locker for my kids' school supplies.
Enter the pie safe: remove shelves, insert very strong adhesive hooks, add baskets for each family member, and “Voila!”, order is restored. Now, they know exactly where to put all those academic odds and sods, and I am the very picture of calm. Most of the time!
Mrs T says
a needed reminder that comes with an “ouch” and a “THANK YOU”
Lindsay says
We have found that limiting toys has been key to our sanity. Our boys love things with little parts (lego, playmobile, knex, etc…), but they are only allowed to have two of these types of toys in circulation at one time. So, if they want to play with knex, they must first put all the legos away which go into…well, since we are actually moving in two days, I'm not sure. It was the basement, then when our house went on the market, it became storage. Our new strategy might be the attic? We also try to encourage family to contribute to an already established collection for gift-giving. People enjoy buying toys, but it helps on clutter control if the toy can soon be added to the existing “bin” or shelf or whatever instead of requiring a completely new one.
I also find that one can find real “tools” in sizes for children. We have a little broom that came with the theater style dustpan we bought for pregnant and absent minded mom (I won't reveal how many dust pans disappeared, presumably in the garbage, before dh came home with this model). Its a perfect size for little ones (and it works well, which isn't always true of toys). Our vacuum is small and has a collapsible handle so it has been easily used to real purpose by my two year olds (fortunately, we don't have much carpet and don't need a bigger machine). Just last week, my husband bought real miniature snow shovels with adjustable handles that are meant to go in the car for emergencies so his three sons (6, 4, 2) could help him shovel snow. I can't say my children will always enjoy chores (I don't), but I do think that involving them in actual help at a young age is important. Imaginative play is essential too, but children also like to feel they are actually contributing in a way that is worthwhile in the adult world and not just pretending to. It IS more work at the beginning (definitely more work than doing it by yourself and sending them off to play). However, I don't think it is quite as hard as parents who have never done it (and never had their child learn to do it) think it is.
Anitra says
I am a HUGE fan of child-size “tools”. Our two-year old has her own snow shovel, broom, and a small hand-spade for digging outside. I've also removed a section of the handle on our Swiffer broom so that either she or I can use it with ease. She “helps” with shoveling and sweeping, and she actually truly helps with laundry – it's much easier for her to get into our front-loading washer and dryer than it is for me to bend over and get things out.
Anitra says
May I update this a year later – the now-three girl has finally learned to usefully sweep and to mop using the Swiffer (which we need to do nearly every day due to a very messy 1-year-old brother!) Unfortunately, she doesn't often come help me with laundry anymore. 🙁
Glenda Childers says
I seriously love the way you think and the practical way you are teaching moms from your past life experience. I join you in my desire to be a Titus 2:3-5 woman. Young moms need us, eh?
Keep up the strong work.
Fondly,
Glenda
Camille says
Yes, Glenda! We do — THANK YOU! 🙂
margo says
I wholeheartedly agree with helping children play in the corners of the “adult” rooms AND having few toys. I am still feeling overwhelmed by the amount of toys our children received at Christmas. It's ridiculous. Most of the time they want to stir stuff in the kitchen or draw with pencil and paper (or rumpus around the house – ha).
One great thing about shelves is that it allows children to see what's available. Toys that are stuffed in boxes and drawers don't get played with as much.
freckled hen says
That braided rug is amazing! I looked at Meg's blog quickly and look forward to reading more. I love that little suitcase full of dough toys, my kitchen drawers are stuffed.
Thanks for the linky inspiration!
Kate
PS I don't think I commented on your knitting post below– you made so many pretty things! It amazes me that you made so much and it all looks so lovely, it seems like it wasn't that long ago that you were writing about your first socks.
Emily says
I love that you highlighted Sew Liberated! Meg and I went to high school together and sang in the same choir. She's done such marvelous things making her home a lovely place to be…for the grown-ups AND the children.
Camille says
Oh I HATE all the little parts! I have managed to get it under control a little with shoebox sized plastic containers. The trains in one; cars in another; etc and they play with those toys more than any other. I feel the need to purge about 80% of what we have. I am determined to get it under control and soon!
Amy says
I am trying to be better at limiting hwo many toys my kids play with at once. We are strting to learn the concept of cleaning up one toy before starting with another. With three little ones, who for the next month and a half will all be 2, life gets crazy. I really need to focus on the toy situation, because like you said kids get overwhelmed (and so do I) when there is clutter and disorganization!
Sue says
We have the” few things” going over here, and even the white shelves – now I really want those blue walls to go with them! We live in a truly small space (880 sq. ft.), for almost 14 years now, having gone from two people to six in that time. I can attest to the fact that kids can get along with, and are better off with, much fewer things than we adults think. We've had no choice but to streamline, and it's been a blessing in the end!
Sarah says
Thanks for the tip off. Limiting toys is definitely essential. We have been astounded at how many toys our 9 1/2 month old has accumulated already. I feel a purge coming on.
Deirdre says
BAAAAA that little kid tidying up is the cutest thing I've seen in a long time!! I was spellbound just watching that video.
wide open spaces says
I shred this video on my blog as well after seeing it here. Seriously impressive. then I went and got rid of 75% of our toys. Plenty of kids who could use them more than us. I love your blog and find myself inspired here time anad again. Such a lovely family you are.
melissa says
Dear Leila…I've been reading your blog for a few months now and love love love…it, especially all the true biblical wisdom and practical advise on being a mother and homemaker……so anyway, I was so thrilled to see your reference to my sister in law, Meg at Sew Liberated! She is such an inspiration, as you can imagine, and Finny is just a doll. Also a huge thank you for your prayers for baby Lachlan…..we continue to lift him up and ask God for complete healing…for strength for the surgeries and all that they will entail…for peace and wisdom for Meg and Patrick as they raise this little one…and for Meg's parents who are so helpful and yet so burdened in their hearts for Meg and for their grandson. Its such a tough thing to understand in light of God's goodness and sovereignty, and we are praying for the best possible outcome. So thank you for joining us in that.
Blessings
Melissa
Lisa says
I am a Montessori teacher. I can’t tell you how many times a day I regret not learning more about and implementing Montessori ideas with my children. They turned out to be good men but they would have had a much happier road (and so would I) had I had the benefit of Maria’s beautiful way of observing and making a beautiful environment.