Everyone is talking about the upcoming start of school. I hate that.
Please can we not talk about school?
I know, I know. You have to be ready. You have to have a plan. Sigh. Me too. But what about summer?
Can't we just enjoy it?
Well, if you want to procrastinate a little more, like I do, how about we talk a bit more about housekeeping?
How about another crazy talky post from me?
I'm trying to finish my little series here, and I believe that I'm almost done. You'll find that on the sidebar I've made another “Happy Home” category for helping you finally make your home Reasonably Clean, Pretty Neat, and Comfortably Tidy.
I do feel a higher tug — to talk more about education and the role of the woman in her home, but I can't help thinking it's futile without the actual tools to cope with the actual things going on in your actual day.
On the one hand, there are those who write about the high calling of making a home and give no details. On the other, there are plenty of resources for getting organized, but they don't take into account having such a busy household and also trying to educate the children.
Oh, it's fine to joke about blessing the mess or how kids grow so fast, why do housework — and believe me, no one knows as well as I do how hard it is to stay on top of things when you have babies and toddlers and kids running around. Because I'm just like you only with less energy.
But keeping a reasonably clean house is part — not all, but part — of the order in Order and Wonder.
And from what I can tell about myself and about you from your comments and emails (well, not all of you, because some of you visit to get satisfaction about how so very orderly you already are, and I'm fine with providing that service), a lot of our frustration comes from simply not knowing where to start when it comes to housekeeping!
Well, check the sidebar. And — I have another concept for you, taken right from this book that I've already recommended, Sidetracked Home Executives.
{Notice that my books are all from the last millennium. I do read the new ones, but I still like these. They are funny and real.}
Anyway, these ladies suggest that you stand outside your house and see it as others see it. Walk in and see what they see.
There's a certain kind of person, self-absorbed, abstract, prone to be found reading novels, for whom this idea is revolutionary!
Not only will this help us to be more orderly, it will transform our sense of hospitality!
Why is it that we are continually entering others' homes, getting an impression of how they live by what we first encounter, and yet never considering that others are doing that exact same thing with us?
Why is it that we may know some people who never let us have a glimpse of their chaos, if they have any, but we don't feel particularly welcomed in their homes? And others are quite open about having lots of life going on, yet we get an overall sense of peace and contentment?
What's the key?
We are stuck inside, mentally as well as physically. We are never seeing beyond the dirty dishes. They somehow, maybe intuitively, know how to make us comfortable from the moment we walk up to their door.
They project something that we need to project!
Seeing our home as others see it can be as life-changing as that view in the 3-way mirror at the mall!
You will learn a lot about yourself if you do this, and do it often.
Take pictures if it helps.
I took pictures and will subject them to a critique for your sake.
My house is just my house. It's not all decorated for bloggy revenue nor do I pretend to be any kind of design arbiter. So you will see lots of flaws, but maybe you'll learn something about your own situation.
Also, keep in mind that this exercise should be carried out every time you walk into your own house! Go where your guests would go and see what they see.
Nota bene #1: Once a person has an impression, good or bad, of your house, it's hard to shake it. Make sure your friends' first impression is of tidiness, and they will forevermore excuse messiness as not you. Vice versa, alas, same thing goes.
Nota bene #2: Everyone has dirty dishes, at least sometimes, but not everyone has stray socks on the front porch.
Don't excuse things because they're your own special mess — you know you don't do that with others.
When you see a finger-printy sliding door at your friend's house, you don't say, “Oh, well, those are her very own children's darling jammy fingerprints!”
You just say, “Eww” and try not to dwell on it. Why are your children's fingerprints and your dog's noseprints any different? And guess what! Three seconds with a paper towel and some (store-brand) windex will take care of it. Even better, most children will snap out of a bratty TV-induced meltdown for a chance to operate a spray bottle, so why not put them on it?
Make them fight over the fabulousness of cleaning the sliding door!
Okay, when you walk up to my porch, you see weedy bricks. Hopefully you are distracted from that by the pretty flowers and hosed-off steps, which need paint (again). But they're clean! Is your front entrance swept and hosed off and free of orphan sneakers, dirty diapers, buckets of dead sand crabs, and balled-up wet towels?
Even wet towels draped over the railing send a better message than ones thrown in the corner or left on the walk. With the privilege of being taken swimming comes the responsibility of hanging out your own towel. First thing.
Ah, there we go. The towel is there but the bricks are weeded. That's what children are for!
You enter my mudroom. No matter what, this is how you come into my house because my real front door is undergoing rehabbing and it's taking a decade. We're working on it, and hopefully there will actually be a reveal soon.
But no matter where people enter, is it neat and tidy? Think about it! Maybe you always come in the garage but your friends don't! Have you seen your entrance recently? What does it say about you?
I have no where else to put my recycling bin and towel drying rack, because the truth is that my house is huge but the workspace in my kitchen is small — but I do try to keep that counter — see it? The one above the recycling in the kitchen? — cleared off.
Here's why.
Inside, from my point of view, I have a clean island, only a few things “in transit”, and it's relatively neat and clean by at least some standards —
But! — I'm tempted to put things on that out-of-the-way counter, below.
It's not near my center — the sink and the table. It's off to the side, and very handy for stuff that's going out the door.
From my point of view, things are still pretty tidy this way.
But from the point of view of someone walking in, especially because of the narrow entry (the brick fireplace starts on the left with very little room to maneuver), what they see is clutter!
See the difference? That counter with stuff (not even that much!), above, and without, below.
You can see why I'm death on leaving the dishwasher open! There is no wiggle room here when you're coming in! Literally!
It's all in your point of view.
When you take your photos, now can you see things as others see them? I should close the cupboards carefully, and make sure the dishwasher is also completely closed. My plastic containers have to dry out there on the counter, but once they are dry, I should put them away. That drink pitcher is so very obtrusive, but it too has to dry before being stowed.
That's okay.
What matters is that if someone drops by, they really will see the me who wants to welcome them — a little weedy and in need of a lick o' paint, but basically neat and tidy — reasonably clean!
And not just guests. Family members too. Kids who have been away, Papa who was running errands, hey– even I like walking in when it's orderly!
This is after years and years of practice! And no babies any more! This is the best I can do, pretty much, so don't feel too bad 😉 Or else, feel very, very superior!
How about you? What exactly do people see when they walk in? How can you make it better?
Lisa G. says
nota bene #1. I love the pictures of your front porch! very pretty.
nota bene #2. I'm going outside RIGHT NOW and weed my little bed in front which is full of tall grassy weeds! See ya later! God willing.
Julie says
Please consider writing a book. Your writing always gives me such joy. I myself would buy many copies. 🙂
Emily says
Agreed! I'd give buy one for myself and then give copies to every homemaking friend I have.
mrsgarageflower says
Me three!
Anna Donnelly says
I’ve been meaning to read this post for three or four years (the only one in this series that I hadn’t gotten to yet, because I was a little scared to read it!) and now finally have. I noticed this comment, probably among a million, about writing a book! Well now you have! Also, when I bought the Summa, one of the first things that I thought was, “I wonder if it’s going to have that section about how other people see your house?” This post was wonderful, helpful, and actually more forgiving — and possibly even more convicting — than I expected. Of course any convicting points also offer an opportunity for liberation, too. I’m excited now to try this and make some changes, and also to stop being as critical of everything I see that is out of place. Only *some* things shouldn’t be out of place, not necessarily every little thing, as long as it is welcoming with an eye toward the right places for clutter. So, anyway, though I’ve written this elsewhere already, thanks for writing the book!
Molly says
Great post! We have two different entrances to our home, the main entrance and the garage entrance which leads to our mudroom. From the mudroom, one can see directly into our kitchen. I work hard at keeping that entrance tidy (especially the counter space in clear view of the doorway) for the same reasons you mentioned. I don't always succeed (especially with five kids traipsing through the mudroom) but I try! I'm hard core, however, about keeping our main entrance tidy and welcoming. Here's a link to a post we did about the main entrance into our home. It was very important to us that upon entering our home, one would immediately discover the Catholicity of our family as well as feel welcomed into the life of our home. http://eccdom.blogspot.com/2010/07/design-for-our… We have found that it is in our main entrance that many opportunities for evangelization occur.
Ona says
Oh Leila~this post was so on time for me today! I check your blog each day, just love it & always glean something from your wisdom 🙂 but today, I just needed that boost, ya know?
Thanks for the effort you & your family put into this….it's really ministers to me.
ginger says
I just sat down for a quick moment to check and see what gems of encouragement I may glean for the rest of the day. How funny that you posted this today….I just finished throwing out a lot of magazines and reorganized all my book shelves….WEW!
For added motivation to help you see your own house objectively….just look at your favorite home magazine and then visit your house. It works well for me, and helps me to throw out things that I just don't need to have around cluttering up. Really, how many cooking magazines do I need to have around.
Always have toilet paper in the the guest bath, have clutter in a room that can be closed off by a door, and have comfortable inviting seating with interesting things to look at, and some great really big picture books or gardens, or architecture or beaches and scenery, and soft classical music playing in the backgroup adds instant elegance no matter where one is….even in an underground train station.
A sure way to make a guest feel uncomfortable is to have clutter, and to talk about how busy you are.
Jeannie says
I agree with you on the toilet paper!
Yikes, I just saw my mantle. Last week I put some baskets there because the coffee table was too enticing for the baby and he got into the magazine basket.
Leila, thank you for posting about enjoying the Summer! We homeschool and I am just trying to relax a bit and enjoy the summer and do not have everything set in stone. I am kind of just trying to enjoy summer with a 7, 5, 2 and 8 month old. 🙂
Off to tidy my mantle.
Jess says
Lovely thoughts, as usual — thank-you for the gentle challenge! You make me feel excited to clean up those “greeting spaces,” instead of feeling guilty about them.
If you happen to have a moment, would you please muse on simplifying children's toys, the way you did their wardrobe? I only have six, but their “stuff” is overwhelming. (Unless you have already and I haven't yet found it)
Gratefully,
Jess
_Leila says
Hi Jess — I think I said somewhere that the stuff multiplies exponentially!
Oh, not helpful, you say?
Hmmm….
Jess says
Like the dust bunnies?!
*smile*
PNG says
I did it! I put my shoes on and walked out to the garage. I came in through the door we and most people come through when just dropping by to say hello. The first thing I saw was a countertop (telephone desk really) that usually gets piled up with stuff. I cleaned it off…found places for everything and now it looks great. The entry from the garage is decluttered and looks tidy.:) Thanks for the help! Today is Paul's birthday (Daddy)…he may not notice when he walks in
Emily says
LOL! My husband never notices my housekeeping efforts, unless things have utterly fallen apart! Sometimes when I've tackled a big project and am proud of the results, I'll ask him if he noticed anything. He says “no, but I'm noticing right now!” Always makes me laugh. 🙂
Lisa says
Oh Leila, I really am motivated (BTW)…I just can't do the 1,000,000 things I want to do quickly enough. But, on my porch….oh my… I just found a pair of garden shoes, oneof pair tennis shoes, two pairs of soccer cleats, two empty plant pots, a metal pitcher, two windshield ice-scrapers, an in-limbo car/booster seat, a big honkin' spider web (spider in full view) and OH! an Amazon package with a new book! Guess I didn't hear the door bell. Okay, back to the kitchen 🙂 Then the porch!!!!!! Love you!
Sue A. says
I'm in trouble. Big Trouble!
hope says
Well, I for one, feel inspired to go clean my front porch. I happened to walk by those afforementioned stray socks, sighed, and said I was too tired to pick them up while holding the baby! So, get off my duff I will, and go do it…. maybe I can even convince a “helper” to sweep the porch and won't my hubby be so proud?? (probably not–observation isn't one of his better skills, ha! and they are HIS socks BTW…..).
_Leila says
Hope, always remember this — kids are closer to the ground, and can pick stuff up easier 😉
freckled hen says
Your yellow cabinets are so pretty and I love the bricks in your kitchen. I didn't even notice the grassy bricks outside because as you said the flowers are so lovely! I go back and forth with my clutter standards, sometimes I find comfort in all the clutter of a big family and other times I yell like a maniac at everyone to PICK UP. I like clean but somedays (like today) it's more fun to sit and read a book.
Angela says
Well, I think they mostly see a clean, reasonably tidy house. I know i have spots to work on….baking cabinet, should vacuum more, need to get hard water off the shower doors. But all in all, tidy and neat.
And I, for one, would love that post on education and the role of women in the home. But it's too hot where you are to think of such BIG things:)
anne says
Oh gosh- how did you know about the balled up towels!!! Really, I needed this. I have been decluttering viciously all day and I was getting really tired and starting to think it was hopeless. Wish me luck, I'm wading back in….
_Leila says
Haha, Anne — how about “tomorrow's another day”?
Kate says
Our property is fenced in, so folks who just drop by usually park out in the road and walk on up to the house. Thus I have spent a lot of time making the once large weedy and bare area a beautiful garden. We get a lot of compliments. The house itself is still in the fixer-uppper stage. We have an enclosed porch, so I treat it like a room with comfortable seating, plants and a nature table. The side closest to the door keeps getting cluttered up with shoes and sports equipment, but I have a couple of large baskets there where shoes are supposed to go and an old wooden chest where sports stuff is supposed to go. We only have one main living area and the front door opens right onto it. The bedrooms are small so the kids play in there or outside. I mostly try to keep drop-by guests on the porch or outside, which they don't seem to mind. Long term guests always give us plenty of time to tidy and clean up.
Lisa G. says
Well, I went out front and got most of the long grassy weeks out of the little bed. Then, I noticed the crab grass between the stones on the walkway in front! My brother week whacks, but the stuff remains. I started pulling them up with my bare hands. He came along and tossed me the weed digger-outer – that was a big help, but it was so hot, I stopped at the almost halfway point. But I made a lot of progress – I have Thursday off – I'll continue.
Thank you, Leila!
Lisa G. says
Oh, dear – haste makes waste, doesn't it? I'm always making typos. 😮
Elizabeth Anne says
What a good reminder (as always…)! Since we're in the two under two stage this summer, I purposely forced myself not to plant anything new this year. Just keeping plants watered here in the Old Dominion in this heat is an accomplishement at this point. Now, though, I realize that the sad potted plants (I gave in a little and bought a few plants for the steps) that are mostly eaten or dead really ought to go, and it is still summer enough to make spending a little bit of money on some nice looking plants a reasonable use of money.
Also, I would like an opinion: we use the front door always, and shoes pile up. There is no space for a bench or little table for stashing things under or something, so the best I have come up with is a pine basket for shoes. Is the goal to hide shoes, put shoes somewhere else or…just have them out but nicely? I just don't know what to do about shoes…
Kathleen T. Jaeger says
Yes, I would love help with the shoes, too!
Mamabear, JD says
I have a shoe basket, but I have to stay on top of everyone to make sure there is just one pair and no socks. I don't know how we'd ever get out the door without shoes in one place, my older ones help the little ones.
justamouse says
Awesome post. I never remember to look at things like I'm a stranger-or even just taking pictures of it-you never realize what's been piling up until you see it all yucky in a picture.
Mama Bean says
“don't feel too bad 😉 Or else, feel very, very superior!” 🙂 this is why i can keep coming here, because at the end, after all the gut-punching reminders to really get on cleaning my life up, you're still charming enough to make me not feel so bad about it 🙂 thanks Auntie
Provincial Homemaker says
Hi Leila – what a refreshing concept. I just went around and took photos – now to do something about it – there are weeds and a few more shoes than necessary cluttering the doorstep.
I was just musing this morning that since our neighbours moved out (they were only people who really popped round) I almost always have advanced notice if someone is coming over but then mid-morning our new neighbour popped round for a cup of tea. I was really glad I had a reasonably tidy house – even if the vacuum was still out and the breakfast dishes hadn't been done;)
Also, I am really looking foward to your post on education and the role of a woman in her home!
Sarah
Mrs. Fordyce says
I remember hearing from a wise friend that if you only keep one area of your home consistently clean it should be the entry way. Very good advice, and I tend to get so distracted by everything else that needs to be done (jelly making! Bill paying! Painting the bathroom! Canning peaches! Ironing!) that I forget about this. Right now, my entryway has a panda bear, Cuisennaire rod, empty shoe box, boot insole, rubber fire engine, and crumped up sweater on the floor, and the rug is askew. It all needs to be vacumed and dusted. I know how my girls will be spending the morning!! Thank you for a much needed pep talk!
Angela in Arizona says
All I noticed was a beautiful red porch! What a delightful home! I live in Phoenix, AZ and we just don't have porches..it's a shame! By the way, I'm a new mom and I love your blog – I read you when/if I get a little coffee break!
Pippajo says
First of all, “crazy, talky post”? PSHAW! I LOVE crazy talky! I sat down all cozy-like to read this and got halfway through before I was interrupted by a power outage (we had a crazy storm with hail and everything this evening). All through the four powerless hours I was on tenterhooks, wanting to read the rest!
Second, the only thing just like me but with less energy is a something like a sea cucumber, so stop that right now.
Third, I must have big, bad problems, for when I am in someone's home and spot some kind of “mess” I instantly feel a kinship with the lady of the house. Seeing sticky fingerprints on a window would make me feel much more at ease. I guess that's bad.
Finally, all that to say I love the idea of taking photos of my home and looking at them like I'm a visitor. I recently came out of a self-absorbed, abstract, novel-reading stupor and took a good look at our entry and said aloud, “Oh dear me!” And then The Viking borrowed a power washer while I tackled the clutter in the kitchen (the room into which everyone enters our house). Next: the dreaded coat cupboard and computer desk!
Thanks for the kick in the pants!
ayearinskirts says
Ok, I did this exercise today and did a bit of weeding and rearranging of flower pots. I also did not notice one plant that was looking funky so when I was at Trader Joes today, I bought a replacement.
Laura Jeanne says
You are right that this is a new concept for some people. I moved out of my parents house 13 years ago now, and I just realized about two months ago that it would be a good idea to look at my house as a guest would see it. Guess what, when I started doing that I didn't like what I saw! I am a terrible housekeeper, which is one of the reasons I appreciate the advice on this blog so much. I really need it!
Now when I don't have time to do much cleaning (which actually, is all the time) I can pretend I'm a stranger walking into a room, and then I noticed which things are the grossest things that really have to be dealt with right away. I can't believe I didn't use to do that.
Jessica says
“And not just guests. Family members too. Kids who have been away, Papa who was running errands, hey– even I like walking in when it's orderly!”
This is so true! Hubby is gone to work anywhere from 9-12 hours each day, we don't have any little ones yet, and we live across the city from all of our friends (we moved recently), so I am the only one coming in and out for the most part. But a sure-fire way to put myself in a funk is to decide I am too busy or tired to pick up after myself. It is just no fun to look around, see messes, and know that you are the reason they are there!
Rachael says
I learned about SHEs from flylady. I learned a lot from flylady and she has really helped me adjust my attitude towards doing housework. Between learning about “blessing your home” (which has helped my perspective) to baby steps, I'm better equipped to run a home.
I'm learning to keep horizontal surfaces cleared off. Thanks for the perspective of what that clear space does for those entering the house. I'm gonna have to spend some time looking to see what I can do to provide that visual space in my entry ways.
Joy says
I never thought about walking in as a guest but it makes sense. My carport is often a cluttered mess and that is one way friends of mine come in. They walk right into my kitchen so I try to keep dishes out of the sink next to the door and clutter off the counter right in front of them as they come in. Some days it is a losing battle though.
I do try to keep the front porch reasonably tidy but there is grass in the cracks on the walk so I should go deal with that. Thanks for making me think about it. I guess this weekend will be a carport tidying weekend. 🙂
Kathy says
Oh, how right you are! I'm going to have to figure out a better place for “stuff to go down to the basement” than at the top of the steps, right where we/others come in. And I liked the suggestion of one of the above commenters to make that space one that particularly reflects your faith. Much to think about, but also much inspiration!
moey says
“On the one hand, there are those who write about the high calling of making a home and give no details. On the other, there are plenty of resources for getting organized, but they don't take into account having such a busy household and also trying to educate the children.” Hallelujah, amen. Have you been reading _Home Comforts_? Also, please write a book. Also, are people really talking about school? I am still talking about what happened last year. I only have six children but am hopelessly behind and slightly computer-addicted at the mo. Thanks for your blog, I love it.
_Leila says
Moey, I have read that book, and although I found it enjoyable, I really think that a) it's a manual for the hired help and b) you can usually do anything you want when you only have one kid!!
moey says
Yes, I reviewed it once on my blog. I was not favorably impressed. It's still sitting, looking brand spanking new, in the garage sale box. 🙂
moey says
“On the one hand, there are those who write about the high calling of making a home and give no details. On the other, there are plenty of resources for getting organized, but they don't take into account having such a busy household and also trying to educate the children.”
Good grief, I don't know whether or not my comment posted or not, or if I even hit “submit comment” (I am slightly distractible) but the jist of it was, “blah blah blah, please write book.” *love*
_Leila says
And I couldn't help approving both your comments — you're so sweet and funny!
Jaimie says
I love our home, but one less-than-desirable feature it has is that we have almost no entryway at all – just enough room for a few hooks for coats. So when you come in the front door, right away you can see straight into the kitchen and living room. So, any mess at all in either of those rooms is immediately noticeable. It's not just a matter of keeping the entryway clean, but also keeping the living room and kitchen clean and tidy too.
All this is not to say that I disagree with this post! I agree entirely. When our family comes in the door and I see an uncleared breakfast table or a living room littered with toys, it immediately makes me feel deflated.
Off to clear the towels and deflated Slip 'n' Slide off my porch right now!
_Leila says
Jaimie, this is a challenge! Now you know why practically my only prayer for a house was, “Please Lord, let it have a mudroom” 🙂
Kh. Patty says
I love that you're embracing school-talk procrastination. I'm guiltily doing the same!
And you're right about needing the actual physical tools to get our work done before we can appreciate our callings as mothers, homemakers, or what have you. When I'm surrounded by piles and dirt, I'm sure not going to embrace much of anything! 😉
RubberChickenGirl says
Must you mention school? And ask what the view looks like from here? Simply awful. I am removing some molding with lead paint, again. I have paint stuff everywhere. I have been recovering my house for like 18 mos from a hot water tank leak disaster. I am working on it…..but it is painful to consider and painfully slow to change. But you keep it real and make me laugh and help me know it can be done!
Thanks, Aunty Leila,
RCG
Janet says
Leila,
I love your home, I love your blog and I love your philosophies on life, love and housework.
Long may you blog!
nt12many says
Leila,
This is exactly why we invite people over for a meal. The whole family cleans from a different perspective!(and, then, if we're not careful we slowly disintegrate into slovenliness again).Of course we invite people over because we also believe that hospitality is a Biblical mandate for Christians but…it does seem to be the one time those really dirty wet socks get cleaned off the front porch (is it a teen aged boy thing?)
“not all of you, because some of you visit to get satisfaction about how so very orderly you already are, and I'm fine with providing that service”…you are too funny.I appreciate you.
Jill Farris ” target=”_blank”>http://www.generationalwomanhood.wordpress.com
godandchocolate says
“This is after years and years of practice! And no babies any more!”
So what about those of us who have babies?
I have a 10-week-old and consider it a successful day of homemaking when she's fed, diapered, and not overtired, the dishes and diaper laundry (and maybe an extra load or two) are done, I've showered and eaten at regular intervals, and I have some concept of what we are to eat when my husband gets home. Bonus points if I've planned a trip to the grocery store, cleaned the bathroom, swept the floors, dusted or vaccuumed. I deserve chocolate if I've moved past all of that to deeper cleaning or organizing. We just moved so I still have unpacking and plenty of projects I'd like to get done. But it's difficult with a little one who needs constant mothering. Tips on making a home during this phase of life?
_Leila says
Yes, dear, that's what this blog is about!
http://www.likemotherlikedaughter.org/2009/01/c…
meals
laundry
rest
when you start wondering where to start, start in your own bedroom.
when you're done with that, start at the front porch!
And enjoy that baby!
Granola Catholic says
okay you have given me the motivation to get back on track with keeping my house up. I have been working on the outside-yard lately. Enjoying some relatively cooler weather to take care of that chore, but I still need to keep things up inside. I know that I definitely feel better coming home to a neat and orderly home.
Kimberlie says
Just found your blog from Jen's 7 QTs. I feel like I can never have anyone over and I live in constant stress that someone might just “drop in.” Our house has an open floor plan so when you walk in to the house, your eye is immediately drawn to the kitchen and dining area. It's always cluttered and in need of cleaning even though I feel like that's all I do. I have four children and I feel like they are finally starting to get with the plan of cleaning up after themselves, but they still boggle my mind. All of them are adopted. All were adopted as older toddlers (our last son being adopted at nearly 7 yrs old), and after years of being developmentally immature, I feel like we are finally getting somewhere. But it boggles me that they STILL will drop their things wherever they happen to be standing at the time and not think twice about it until I make them pick it up. So far, no consequence has worked though I just instituted a monetary consequence. They have to pay me if clothes and shoes do not go back where they belong. Maybe hitting them in the wallet will help.
Anyway, I do feel a bit overwhelmed with four children and all the driving around that I do for school, church, etc, and now I am homeschooling one part time (he goes to a Montessori school 2 days a week and is home the other three days – he's in 2nd grade).
I think I have a problem that I think most women/mothers do not suffer from: I can not multi-task. I have a hard time completing things if I get constantly interrupted by the demands/fights of my children. It seems unbelievable because most women are great multi-taskers, but I can't seem to do it. I am either all in or all out. Any advice on how to develop multi-tasking skills?
priest's wife says
1. Treat yourself to a few of Leila's posts for inspiration
2. pack away most of the kids stuff- anything out of season and most of the toys to rotate. Less stuff out means there is less stuff to be messy
3. as for multi-tasking, start slowly. When you are drying a load of laundry- think of what you can do before you need to fold. can you load the dishwasher or make some phone calls? When you get in the car to go to the post office, can you also do another errand- Leila doesn't do monthlt freezer cooking- but shhe does 'save a step cooking' so always double up and plan for leftovers- that is sort of like multi-tasking.
priest's wife says
4. As for your overwhelming open floor plan, have one kid in charge of keeping shoes non-crazy, one kid in charge of clearing and wiping the table, one kid in charge of rinsing and putting dishes in dishwasher so that counters NEVER have dishes on them (just the sink or dishwasher or put away) and one kid in charge of toy-wrangling in the living room twice a day (before nap and before Dad comes home)-ignore the toys at other times- if you have stored most of the toys, the amount shouldn't be that bad- You are in charge of putting a potted plant/flowers/candle on your clear dining table—ignore the rest during this time in your life—a clear dining table means that you can always sit down to meals together and maybe even do some crafting/sewing
Kari says
Auntie Leila,
What “solution” do you use to mop your floors? Occasionally I'll borrow my mom's shark, but the between-steam-cleaning-times what's the magic stuff for a mop? Vinegar? Bleach? (store brand) 409?
Thanks!
Kari
_Leila says
For my tile I use SpicNSpan. I like how it smells! For my wood in the kitchen I use a wood floor solution that works on a poly'd floor.
Marcella says
Our entrance is isolated. Out of sight, out of mind. I have my dining room acting as my work room. My office is messy…kids needs to quit trashing my desk with their artwork and supplies, etc.
BUT if you walk in my house all you see is a mess of these two rooms. Looks like a bomb went off in there. I need to work on those rooms and actually put things away when I'm finished using them. The dining/work room is all me. No one is allowed to go in there unless I am in there. ::Hangs head in shame::