{Do you like my new rug? I love it. Downside (as I tried to indicate on my very first IG story ever, but failed due to technical inadequacy): no small toys will be detectable, which sounds fine until you step on one!*}
So this week is a little breather that doesn't happen very often — a week between Thanksgiving and the beginning of Advent! (Of course, the sense of time-luxury gets snatched away when Christmas comes the day after the Fourth Sunday of Advent, but sufficient unto the day is the evil thereof and all that!)
It's possible that I first became fully aware of getting ready for Advent in just such a year: an anomalous one like this one, where the first Sunday of Advent does not come right on the heels of Thanksgiving.
And it's possible that this timing gave my not-fully-liturgically-formed mind a false sense of security. Because later it was quite a shock to realize that the more usual procedure is to be putting out the Advent wreath (and finding out you don't have Advent candles!) while boiling down the turkey bones. Which is a lot of dealing with reality for the likes of me.
But let's take advantage of this year's little respite to plan just a bit for the next three weeks! If, that is, you are like me and things always catch you off guard. If you are up on it all, just move on along!
- On my shopping list will be the ingredients for Plum Pudding. The collect for this past Sunday was
Stir up the will of your faithful, we pray, O Lord, that striving more eagerly to bring your divine work to fruitful completion, they may receive in greater measure the healing remedies your kindness bestows. Through our Lord Jesus Christ, your Son, who lives and reigns with you in the unity of the Holy Spirit, one God, for ever and ever.
As Evelyn Vitz recounts in her lovely book A Continual Feast, British Christians heeded the words “Stir up” that begin this prayer by stirring up their Christmas dessert! Yes, with its heavy soaking of brandy, this pudding will be safely tucked away for your festivities at the end of the month! (The link above is my tutorial — do check it out!)
- Since we're shopping, pick up Advent candles!
- In our book, The Little Oratory: A Beginner's Guide to Praying in the Home, we write that the seasons of Advent and Lent are particularly suited for beginning again in the liturgical life. We do have regrets that we didn't observe our devotions in the past, and certainly, we parents look at our children and wonder how to begin at all.
The good news is that the First Sunday of Advent is the ideal time to introduce prayer in your home, beyond what you may be doing now. To the children, nothing seems more natural than the preparations we begin for Christmas — and that is Advent! As we set out our Advent wreath and little calendar, they eagerly await the songs and prayers that go along with them.
So if you've been feeling a little inadequate, take heart! Nothing more is required of you than that you live your Advent in a childlike way, along with your children.
The “curriculum,” so to speak, for educating our children in the faith is exactly this: to observe the liturgical seasons and to allow the prayers and devotions of each one guide us to know Christ and his Church better.
You will notice that even the feast days of the saints that enter into our Advent life support and sustain the vision we are working towards, of the coming of Our Lord in the flesh at the Nativity! It's so beautiful.
Think of how St. Nicholas (the 6th) brings his love of children; the Immaculate Conception, that great Solemnity, offers us a chance to dwell on the Mother of God — this is her time, you know. It's the time in which the whole preparation of Creation for the coming of the Lord is brought to a point, the one woman who will give her Yes. Think of St. Lucy, whose very name brings in the hint of the light of sanctity that keeps us on the way out of the darkness to the Light.
In this season we will learn the art of celebrating in the midst of austere preparation. Just before Christmas are the last of this year's Ember Days. Maybe now give a thought (and a conversation with your spouse) about how you will approach the inevitable parties that crop up. There is a way to enjoy each other's company without totally abdicating our “yearning and longing” mode of preparation!
- Want to know a secret? Advent has its own beautiful carols! Of course we can sing Christmas carols as well (we have to learn all the verses, after all, and get ready for concerts and such!) — and it's wise to sort of order them from less to more outrageously joyful so as to pace ourselves. The great news is that there is an amazing repertoire of Advent hymns and carols that used to be quite well known — and should be again. Each one is a little mini-catechism on Salvation History and the Incarnation. You can find many of them in my favorite book, Take Joy by Tasha Tudor. Sadly this book is no longer in print, but you can find copies at book sales occasionally!
Some Advent albums for you:
Advent at Ephesus (Benedictines Of Mary, Queen Of Apostles)
Puer Natus Est (Stile Antico)
Praetorius: Advent and Christmas Music (Bremer Barock Consort)
Advent Carols from St. John's (Choir of St. John's College)
From Darkness to Light: The Salisbury Advent Service (This one is very much an Advent “lessons and carols” recording from the actual church service, so not a “concert.”)
Edited to add these CDs you'll want as Christmas comes closer:
Chanticleer Sing We Christmas – beautiful traditional carols
- Here are all my Advent posts from the past, linked in this Advent post. So if you are just not sure, I think I will have some answers for you! Take a look around!
(The links above are Amazon affiliate links! Thanks for shopping with us!)
Now I think I'll go rummage in my boxes and figure out what I need to get my own Advent going. The main thing is to live along with the Church as she takes us through this season to the Nativity. When we live our Advent, simply and peacefully, our children will naturally come along the journey with us!
*Here's the Ebay store I got the rug from is called rughouse.
This is not an affiliate link — I just want you to know that I was very pleased with my all-wool rug for less than the price of a not very nice synthetic one!
Paula says
Very pretty rug! :)…and can’t say much about the toys-perhaps out law the legos at Gma’s house?
Kate says
“…no small toys will be detectable, which sounds fine until you step on one” – or vacuum one up and disaster ensues! But yes, a very pretty rug. It should bring you much cheer during the winter.
I hate it when Advent starts the Sunday after Thanksgiving. We usually go out of town for a couple of days to be with family for Thanksgiving and it’s such a scramble to get everything Advent related ready when we come back. I’m quite ready this year. I do know I have candles because any time I see pink or purple candles at the thrift store, I snatch them up (I scored this year with a complete, unopened set). I got wise a few years ago and put all my Advent items in a marked bin, separate from the Christmas items. I don’t know why it took me so long to figure that one out. Our Advent and Christmas will be busier because of choir rehearsal and altar serving – vespers, Immaculate Conception, Nine Lessons and Carols, Christmas day Mass, Christmas Midnight Mass and Christmas Day Mass (my husband had a lapse of sanity and volunteered for the last without consulting me). Then we repeat the liturgical madness the following weekend. Logistically it should be a challenge, but I’m looking forward to the season. My kids are looking on the bright side of a shorter Advent – only three weeks of giving up something. Such is the stuff of future saints.
Logan says
Query: I just read over your plum pudding instructions. For some reason I thought there was something about stirring a plum pudding. Like everybody needs to stir the pudding and that’s part of the ritual. Am I making this up?
Also, is it sacrilege to not use raisins?
Leila says
Logan, I think you are right! I think in the book she says that it was the custom for each family member to give a stir! It does help you remember the Collect!
I put in the fruits I like and you should too! I think I might use golden raisins but have certainly left them out on occasion!
Carrie says
Yes, it is absolutely the custom for everyone in the family to stir! I’m one of your loyal British readers and I can attest that Stir Up Sunday is most definitely a Thing – even non-churchgoers will probably recognise it without knowing the origin of the phrase. I always make our Christmas pudding and we each stir from biggest to littlest.
Logan says
I love this! And Stir Up Sunday is traditionally the first Sunday in Advent?
Leila says
It’s what is now Christ the King, the Sunday before Advent.
Cami says
I snatched up a copy of Take Joy! by Tasha Tudor (per your recommendation) with a lingering Etsy gift card balance. I’m excited!
Also, I like your rug very much! We need one too but we are in a rental again and I hate buying stuff for a place we will soon leave and then perhaps it doesn’t work in the next space.
I’m looking forward to advent. The only things I dread about the upcoming seasons are a) we eat gluten free and plant based (no animal products) mostly due to food sensitivities which makes parties and events with food difficult and b) Santa doesn’t visit us on Christmas Eve. We celebrate St. Nick’s feast day and Jesus’ birthday. So being bombarded by strangers and friends asking us if we’re getting ready for Santa or being good for Santa is uncomfortable. Any thoughts on that, Dear Auntie?
Leila says
Cami, all I can say is that at least around here (New England), I could sell that rug for at least what I bought it for, judging by my extensive search on Craigslist before going over to Ebay! I don’t know where you are, but it’s worth thinking about. And mine is almost 10 x 13, but a 7 x 9 or even 8 x 10 will fit pretty much anywhere, right?!?
As to the questions about Santa, you (and the kids) can just smile and nod? You can explain to the kids that Santa is St. Nick and some people expect him on Christmas Day… my personal thought is that children accept all of this and it doesn’t disturb them at all when they outgrow it. We find we don’t have to be super literal after all. In any case, this is the culture we live in (at least, this is the last vestige of it! many Christians do wait for Santa on Christmas Eve!) and nodding and smiling might be the best way to reconcile it with your own customs.
CamiCakes says
We are new New Englanders (CT) just as of this fall! So thank you for the input on the rug reselling. Good to know! And yes, the smile and nod has been my go-to most times. I’m a pretty literal person as is my very mature and ambitious truth-seeking first born (age 6, going on 10!) so we just explain, similar to what you described that some families like to celebrate Santa (St. Nick) on Christmas Day and the many Santa stories are based on the original story of the generous and kind Saint. So far it’s working just fine. But my more imaginative 5 year old has a hard time keeping track of it all and does get swept up in the more creative stories. I find it tricky to reconcile the two needs of such different children. But I’m trying to unfold Jesus’ story in a mysterious and captivating way so that it satisfies the need for truth and enchantment. We’ll see. Figuring it out as I go!
Jamie says
Thank you so much for setting all to right yet again. I shall be gathering my plum pudding ingredients from freezer and larder and shopping for that which I do not have. Once tucked away, I shall then proceed with my Dickens style Christmas as my busy family does what they need to do. Because you have given me the game plan yet again: it’s all about Christ and His birthday party and there is that in the Dickens manner of celebrating that to me seems to catch the spirit of the occasion. Anyway, thank you again and may your preparations be blessed.
There is truly nothing worse than stepping on a small lego. Oh well.
The family is singing the Messiah this Friday and Sunday. We have been listening to different recordings and it is truly an inspired masterpiece.
Helen says
Even worse than stepping on lego? KNEELING on it!
Jamie says
You are right!
Anel says
Dear Leila. I’m coming along nicely with my felt advent calendar, and as always, im overthinking… since the first Sunday in advent is after the 1st of December, it is still obviously okay to start with the Advent calendar on 1 Dec..?
And also, do you have a good scriptural reading list that also contains text from the old Testament… to read and discuss each night?
Thanks so much…
Leila says
Anel, yes — you can see how Advent calendars, to be used every year, need to just start on Dec. 1 — otherwise you’d have to make a different one every year! So we just go with that.
As to readings, I would stick to the Mass readings and/or the Office of Readings. If you go to Unversalis.com you will find them. The Office of Readings is one of the “hours” in the Divine Office (doesn’t take an hour) with 3 psalms, a reading from Scripture, and a reading from (usually) a Church Father. Both the Mass readings and those of the Liturgy of the Hours are divinely inspired to lead us through the days according to what is going on in the Liturgical Year, so they are not “someone’s” choices but God’s choices to give you exactly what you need to hear at that moment.
The Mass readings always include one from the Old Testament and a Psalm, as well as a Gospel reading of course.
Lynette says
Thank you for this: So if you’ve been feeling a little inadequate, take heart! Nothing more is required of you than that you live your Advent in a childlike way, along with your children.
I need a restart without guilt.
Jennifer says
Take Joy is a favorite book here too! I had just brought it out when I read your post 🙂
Stephanie says
I love the title of this post! So this year before Thanksgiving my eldest girls and I watched Rick Steves European Christmas while we drank hot wassail. So I am a bit of a nerd about these things, but I was surprised by how much my kids enjoyed it! Maybe everyone already knows about this particular show but you can find it on YouTube, it is only an hour long and it is absolutely lovely. When we visited the English kitchen the children were stirring up the pudding …and singing too! ” oh bring us some figgy pudding ” Thank you also for the reminder to be like the little ones!
Julia says
I so enjoyed reading about your Plum Pudding tradition for Christmas. The idea of a flaming dessert is quite enticing! In the spirit of sharing favorite Christmas traditions I am adding this comment to say that in our home we have taken a fancy to the Buche de Noel. Of course, it is delicious but in addition to this it’s such fun to think about different ways to decorate the cake! The decorating can be kept very simple OR you could get elaborate and fancy. I’ve definitely spent an enjoyable hour or two (or three!) ogling the Buche de Noels on Pinterest. Three cheers for considering Christmas desserts before Advent has even commenced!
Leila says
Oh yes, Julia, we have to plan the desserts! What I love about REAL Christmas is that it’s 12 days (and more!). We often do a buche de Noel for our New Year’s Eve party, or a French friend brings one (which is very kind of her, since she herself is gluten free!). I could really get into decorating it too — much more so than gingerbread houses, for some reason! But I’m usually too frantic with party prep, and in the past, the girls have done the making and decorating. Maybe someday when I retire 😉
Michael says
We own Tasha Tudor’s Take Joy! (which is wonderful), but I don’t see advent hymns and carols in it. There is a Christmas Carols section, but it does not include any of the selections on the CDs you recommend. Is there another book with a good selection?