The weekly “little of this, little of that” feature here at Like Mother, Like Daughter!
Reading update! I told you I'd try to keep you posted on our library books. We just got to the library late in the week, so we haven't fully delved into our selection. So far, Finnabee is enjoying Richard Scarry's Find Your ABC's. Are you familiar with Richard Scarry? My siblings and I grew up with him and I can attest that this next generation is loving him as well. Somehow these books are just endlessly fun to look at and the stories are generally appealing to a wide range of ages.
I'm also liking The Dancing Tiger. I think I'm partial to children's books in poem form. The Artist and I agree that we love the illustrations, although we're not 100% sure about all the themes. If any of you are familiar with it, I'd be interested to hear your thoughts!
On to our links!
- If you are someone who loves a good birth story, I recommend this one from my husband's college friend: The story of Hazel's Birth. I share it not only because it's a good read, but because it's a great example of a woman trusting her body and advocating for herself, surrounding by proper care and support. For every Hollywood birth scene we see (and I enjoy a funny depiction as much as the next girl) or traumatic story we hear about, we need several good, natural birth stories in our heads!
- Have you been hearing the term ‘kosileg' bouncing around? I first came upon it here: The Norwegian Secret to Enjoying a Long Winter. Note to self: remember, come January and February, that you decided you're not going to bond with neighbors by complaining! (Writing it here, in public, to help myself stay accountable.)
- Here's a fascinating, very short documentary about a Philly-based chef who has had success despite a serious injury — that left him without his sense of taste. If there's a Will, There's a Way
- Are you familiar with the artist Daniel Mitsui? He has a page where you can print out images of his work for your children to color. He has made them available specifically as a service so that they will have high-quality images to ponder during Mass – definitely read his little reflection about the project and get the printables (and make a donation, if you can) here!
- A great question to be asking in the quest for a more stable marriage culture: are couples actually making marriage vows at their weddings? Sometimes, a whole wedding ceremony comes and goes and nothing substantial – much less marital – has actually been promised by either bride or groom. This matter is examined in I do? from First Things. This piece has some great insights and is a deep consideration of something that has bothered me for a while. (That being said, Auntie Leila would doubtless warn against relying on “programs” to address such problems, as the author calls for towards the end of the article.)If you wrote your own vows for your wedding and are not sure if you have made a real marriage commitment, I suggest you look up the traditional vows and get right on that! In a church. With witnesses. I mean it.
- Music is a big part of church. How much do you know about what kind of music assists us as we worship? Our friend Paul Jernberg (who wrote this excellent essay) sent this article (not particularly new, but a good one), which delves into some of the questions.
- Speaking of Mass, if you are in the greater Boston area this December 8, Feast of the Immaculate Conception (which is a Holy Day of Obligation), perhaps you can plan to worship with the St. Gregory the Great Church,which is a community of the Personal Ordinariate of the Chair of St. Peter. Maybe we will meet you there! Here is their lovely poster with the information:
From the archives:
- We already linked to this on our Facebook page (you will occasionally find some extra info there, so why not go “like” us now?), but don't forget this classic Ask Auntie Leila post on No, Really, How Do You Prepare for Thanksgiving?
- If you want to be kosileg(ing?), you have to be dressed properly.
- Speaking about the truths of marriage as communicated by the ceremonies/celebrations, do you know a bride or mother of the bride who could benefit from the {pretty, happy, real weddings} series? Please pass it along!
- A simple Advent craft from Sukie — if you grab some felt now, you'll be ready to start this in a week or so!
~We’d like to be clear that, when we direct you to a site via one of our links, we’re not necessarily endorsing the whole site, but rather just referring you to the individual post in question (unless we state otherwise).~
Erin Meyer-Gutbrod says
Thanks so much for linking to my birth story Deirdre! I love following your blog 🙂
Deirdre says
I didn’t know you read LMLD, Erin! Fun to find you here (I was going to alert you that I had linked :)!
Bethanne says
So happy you are promoting Daniel Mitsui! His work is complex and beautiful–perfect for lifting hearts and minds to Christ and his coloring pages are amazing and a gift for all of us!
Susan says
The pastor of St. Gregory the Great was my pastor in college when we were both Anglicans! It was the worship there that finally got me back to the Church and I was so, so happy when I found out he’d converted. We have attended Mass with them (at their old location) and it was amazing.
Cordelia says
Re: marriage vows: eh. (shrugs). I was married in the Orthodox church (possibly the most doggedly traditional Christian wedding service around), and the Orthodox wedding service has no vows at all! There is no “I do”. The closest you get is when you’re out in the narthex, and the priest asks if the bride and groom are there of their own free wills. Everything else is solemnizing and asking God’s blessing. Perhaps the problem lies not in the not-promising-anything and more in the granting-of-all-authority-to-self inherent in writing your own vows.
Deirdre says
I think you may be on to something there about the authority question, Cordelia…
That being said, Catholic theology is very different on this matter, as the couple are the ministers of the Sacrament through the uttering of vows.
Janet says
On the “I do?” link, about couples not saying ” till death do us part”:
This song, from Bach’s Anna Magdelaena Notebook, is a favorite at weddings (both Catholic and Protestant)in German speaking countries. Scroll down for English translation and a link to a beautiful performance.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=x5r_fZ98514
Bist du bei mir, geh ich mit Freuden
zum Sterben und zu meiner Ruh.
Ach, wie vergnügt wär so mein Ende,
es drückten deine schönen Hände
mir die getreuen Augen zu![2]
If you are with me, I go with joy
To death and to my rest.
O how joyous would my end be,
If your fair hands
Would close my faithful eyes.[3]
After 40 years of marriage, this speaks to me more than ever.
Leila says
Janet, the Chief and I had this beautiful piece at our wedding! One of my favorite memories.
Janet says
One more comment on wedding vows. In the Orthodox tradition, there are no vows during ANY sacrament, in obedience to our Saviors words, Let your yes be yes and your no be no. So here is an example in which the couple most emphatically do not make things up, but which is about God’s blessing empowering the couple to have a Christian marriage, not about the couple’s promises. Summary/ excerpts below:
the priest asks God to be present; to bless the marriage; to preserve their bed unassailed; to give them the dew of heaven; to fill their houses with every good thing; to send down heavenly grace to bless, preserve and remember the bride and groom; and just prior to the crowning:
stretch out now also Thy hand from Thy holy dwelling‑place, and unite this Thy servant, N. and this Thy handmaiden, N.; for by Thee is the husband joined unto the wife. Unite them in one mind; wed them into one flesh, granting to them the fruit of the body and the procreation of fair children.
And then the priest crowns the couple (three times), saying each time: “Crown them with glory and honor!” (see Psalm 8:5) [from here https://blogs.ancientfaith.com/glory2godforallthings/2013/07/26/no-wedding-vows/%5D
Anamaria says
Thanks for the library update! We have lots of books, but not many we love. My husband just found an old Caldecott winner,They were Strong and Good by Robert Lawson. I highly recommend it!
Thanks for the birth story, too- it was really helpful the first time around to have read realistic but empowering birth stories.
Hilary says
Baby Hazel’s homebirth story was really touching. My friend is making a documentary about medical professionals who chose homebirth–given your love of birth stories, you’ll probably find it very interesting! bit.ly/whynothomenow
Deirdre says
I will check it out! Thanks, Hilary!
Kathryn says
After reading Hazel’s birth story, I am reminded of shoulder distocia homebirth stories that sadly ended in either mental retardation after weeks in intensive care or death of the baby. I am having my next baby in the hospital with a CNM after three big babies being born quickly with an experienced direct entry midwife at home. I know hospitals are not as comfortable since I had my first baby at one, but I can see how fast things can go wrong even with a healthy pregnancy; and the risk of baby dying is higher at home ( in our country), and now feel that hospitals are the safer bet, even if they are not as ideal as far as birth experience. Having a CNM should still enable me to have a low intervention, natural birth, as I’ve had with my last four children. I may be wrong, but I am not taking the chance this time.
Deirdre says
Hi Kathryn, I’d be interested to know where you learned that risk to baby is higher at home in the US. That doesn’t jive with what I’ve heard and read. Thanks for any info!
Kathryn says
Please check Dr. Amy Tuteur’s website SkepticalOb.com and watch the video on the right under, ” Thinking of homebirth? Watch this video!” She talks about the statistics on homebirth death rates after the first few minutes. The statistics by MANA have now been released, which they weren’t at the time of the video, and on the right of the website under “If homebirth is safe…” is the article that changed my mind on homebirth. I do not agree with her views on breastfeeding, attachment parenting, or feminist agenda, but I do trust her education to read statistics and studies on homebirth and interpret them. What do you think?
Anamaria says
So far, I’m a hospital with midwives birther, but the good stats I’ve read say that planned home birth in a low-risj situation with an experienced midwife is just as safe as hospital birth- the problem with most stats is they are too broad. They include unplanned home births, unattended births, and women who should not give birth at home (gestational diabetes, preeclampsia, etc, which a good midwife would not agree to do). http://mana.org/index.php?q=blog/home-birth-safety-outcomes
Anamaria says
I just looked at that website and I personally would not trust her to interpret statistics. Statistics are unfortunately numbers that can be manipulated to fit one’s agenda- and she certainly has an agenda! She has no respect for midwives, while the midwives I know have knowledge most OBs don’t have- yet they have respect for OBs. I wish I had time to look up all the numbers she gives, but I don’t. Like I said, I don’t have a personal stake in this as I am currently happy with my hospital birthing situation, but I still think it is important to take a broader look at statistics, health, and safety.
Kathryn says
I respectfully wanted to give my opinion on homebirth. I love reading your blog and am so thankful for everything I have learned here. Thanks for all of your hard work!
abby hummel says
I’m with you Kathryn — I love the LMLD ladies & readers so much, but pretty concerned about the way homebirth risk is dismissed in so many circles. (not just here!) I never know how to chime in (as I’ve only experienced hospital births) but I’m glad there is room for you to share your experiences and perspective, too. I also know people in hospitals who have been able to “dance out” a shoulder dystocia, so it does seem most charitable to avoid making sweeping statements that paint hospitals as dangerous and inept — because not all shoulder dystocias can be danced out, and when it comes down to it — even a large episiotomy is preferable to an avoidable stillbirth or brain damage. Ultimately we can’t see into the future so we can only make the decisions that seem most prudent without all the details ahead of time! For my husband and me, the excess cost and other discomforts associated with a hospital delivery & recovery are part of the sacrifice of parenting, and the comforts associated with it are an added blessing.
Deirdre says
Hi Abby! Yes, of course you can weigh in with disagreements… I’m the type of person who tends to be up for debate. 😉
That being said, I’m not sure what you read here as being a sweeping statement portraying hospitals as dangerous and inept.
My goal with sharing the story was to provide a well-told, natural birth story. I love birth stories and ones like these are what made a huge difference for me in preparing for childbirth with as much freedom from fear as possible.
NY Mom says
The poster design for the Dec. 8 Solemn High Mass at St. Gregory’s Church is absolutely beautiful.
Tacy Williams Beck says
We love Daniel Mitsui! We received a piece of his art at our Confirmation/First Communion.
Ashley says
Deirdre,
Your husband is The Artist, so I thought I’d ask – do you known of anyone who makes religious sculptures? If so, I’d love your help.
Thanks,
Ashley
Deirdre says
Hi Ashley! I don’t know of anyone off the top of my head. But I’ll think about it and keep my ears open. And if anyone does know of someone, please chime in!